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May 2008

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The lesbians next door to me are getting a bit out of hand. Now, I'm a big fan of lesbians, so it's not that. They fight all the time. "Fuck you bitch!" all night long. It's starting to interrupt my sleep. Now keep in mind that I also have two small children. So, I've decided to write an anonymous letter to my landlord in hopes that this will alleviate the problem. It sounds pretty good I think. But, I'm not too sure about that P.S. part. Tell me your thoughts.


Dear Mr. Landlord:

I have the unfortunate pleasure of writing this letter in regards to the lesbians, I mean tenants, residing at xxxmyaddressxxx, Apt B in Harahan, LA.
I voice the following complaints:
� Violent fighting (some physical) with the tenants and their guests. Some fighting would proceed to the sidewalk area. This has occurred on one occasion at 4am and lasted for over an hour. Someone even called the authorities due to disturbance of the peace, but it wasn't the girl in apt D because she would never do something like that.
� There are usually more than four cars for this residence. Two of which are ALWAYS parked in the visitor�s slot. I think the cars belong to their stripper lesbian licking....um friends. If these tenants in fact have visitors that would be one thing, but this is becoming a daily event. Most of the time the parking of these tenants makes it difficult or nearly impossible for others to move their cars--especially the sweet girl in apartment D. Poor thing.

I am requesting that something be done about the inconvenience this has caused to the rest of us that are trying to sleep while others are having kinky lesbian sex...er causing a disruptance.

Anonymous tenant

P.S. The girl who resides in apartment D, however, is the sweetest person I�ve ever met. I think you should give her three free months of rent. Hell, just let her live there for free.


Sound good?

Comments

Sounds pretty good...
I would leave out the PS and the "but it wasn't the girl in apt D because she would never do something like that."
That just totally tells them that it is you.
If you want them to think that it IS you, it would be better to just write them a formal letter with your name and all.
Is it me?
Why does no one ever get my attempts at humor?

Re:

I GET it....I got it. I giggled.
But if you want them to take the complaint seriously.....wait a sec...you mean that the entire post was a joke or?????/
Hehe...yes dear. The letter was meant to be funny; however, I am sending a real one without the connotations that the girl in apt D (me) is the one actually sending it. I'll be sure to take out the reference of the tenants being lesbians as well. Hehehe...
Cher.

Re:

:)

ROFLMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

That was definitely a classic "Cherbear" journal entry :)

*huggles*
Jenn

Re: ROFLMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I agree! Nice editing job! lol
heh heh heh, it's funny babe :)
but, i'd put in the fact that you have small children and don't appreciate
the obscenities being bandied about through the paper thin walls...
Since I'm trying to stay anonymous that wouldn't work, as I am the only one residing at such residence with children.
*grins*

Your rapier wit astounds me, m'lady!
I'm glad SOMEONE appreciates it. Stay tuned...